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Can someone check or fix my thesis statement. "I realized that learning to read and write can benefit you in life, if you don't give up."

Writing
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i realised, leaning to read read and write could be beneficial provided that we must not give up
Avoid words like "can" and "may, as they are less assertive than just saying that reading/writing benefits. Also using the 2nd person in a paper isn't a good idea because you don't know what your audience is experiencing necessarily. I would try to define what exactly is being benefited by reading and writing (in other words, how does it benefit us?)
A thesis statement should be stated as FACT, even if you don't know that it is. Try this: Learning to read and write is one of the most important things you can do for yourself; if you persevere, your future will benefit greatly.

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