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Venomblast

  • 2 years ago

i want to make my plot shorter. please help. i will attach

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  1. Venomblast
    • 2 years ago
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  2. iheartfood
    • 2 years ago
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    i proofread it a bit for you. but i don't think u can make it shorter.... and u must keep everything in one tense... in this case, present tense... here you go... the parts i fixed are in red :) hope that helps!

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  3. Venomblast
    • 2 years ago
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    so you are saying it is good enough the way i had it?

  4. iheartfood
    • 2 years ago
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    i would use the one where i fixed it since there were a lot of errors and you need to stick to one tense... but what you wrote was good... just use the parts i fixed :)

  5. Venomblast
    • 2 years ago
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    ok thanks you so much :)

  6. iheartfood
    • 2 years ago
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    np :) good luck!!

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