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Hi please help!! I'm really not good at this... :( is this already a good thesis statement? Thank you! "Reforms should be made to significantly alleviate working conditions of teachers and in effect further enhance the country's educational system."

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@ganeshie8 ? :D @Agent_Sniffles :D @Carl_Pham ? :D if it isn't a hassle for you guys???
@dydlf its good but i hv no idea regarding your objectives...

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do i need to enumerate the reforms in the thesis statement even if i'll be mentioning them???
so what should i do, @matricked ? objectives as in? oh right it's an argumentative paper!
A better wording would be: "Reforms to alleviate difficult working conditions of teachers would enhance the country's educational system." Simpler, more to the point, punchier. Your next sentence begins "Among the most important reforms would be..." Then after you list them briefly, you bring them back up one by one in succeeding paragraphs, explaining what they are, the conditions or problem they'll alleviate, and (ideally) how they are practical. You conclude with some bromide about education being the foundation of the future, nothing is more important than the children, et cetera.
Good idea to understand the teachers role to the society,its development and purpose as welfare ....
If you have something other than a random grab-bag, that is, if there is some over-arching theme that connects your proposed reforms, you can mention it in your concluding paragraph for more impact.
@matricked ohhh! i mentioned those in my paper anyway thank you to you both!! i REAAAAALLY appreciate it!!
welcome and my best wishes
wow you guys are great ... :D continue doing great work.....:D

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