What do you think of this piece of poetry I wrote?
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Act: N of VI
----------------Eternity of Lightwaves--------------------
The six winged Seraphim from Heaven named Lane,
Looks upon the quenched land,
Cold dewy drops of rain rest upon the plains
Over the Horizon peaks Dawn,
Her love strips away sorrow and pain.
Vehement passion radiates from her soul,
She smiles upon man,
Light spreads afar across poles,
The light awakes Endymion from his sequestered rest,
Truly, a gift given from God’s hands.
No longer is the uncertain morrow to be feared
Her love holds me near
As the light scatters in rays,
Dreams pour from the sky,
Lane’s love is unchanged,
Her essence brings life.
Your smile is the pinnacle of perfection,
The gleam reaches afar galaxies of time,
Waters grow calm when they gaze upon your sweet reflection,
Seas begin to ripple and rise.
Gently with coal you touched my lips as in Isaiah 6:7
Sins of man thrown in fire,
Truly you descended from Heaven,
Serene thoughts flow across the night,
And bringing life.
From all these good deeds your eternal soul knows no rest,
Gruesome melodic hymns vibrate from quartets,
Dark times are upon mankind,
A soft requiem pierces throughout the night,
She is running out of time.
Four demons strip her beauty with symphonies’ of destruction,
Moons blacken, for the night light is lost to Sariel,
Rahab grins as rivers of life turn to depths of seclusion,
Agony fills the veins of pleasure, for prevailed is Duriel
Mephistopheles destroys chasms of peace,
Middays is over the horizon as nothing is left,
Dreams of the morrow are shattered, dead.
Night smothers the light of today,
Her six wings stripped away,
No emotions in her heart remains,
No longer does she have Angelic rays,
Gleams are darkened by sorrowful rain,
Light of beauty begins to fade,
Cold chasms of hate start to overtake,
Her soul is rots on this day,
Emerges from her is a hateful beast,
Her darkness blackens the heaven with sweet blaspheme,
You begin to eat men with blood-drenched teeth,
All is lost, peace, love, and dreams,
My love has rebelled against Heaven,
Children are impaled,
Men and women bludgeoned,
And now you've fallen to Hell
Those memories have come to past,
You are an angel fallen from grace,
No hope of my Lane coming back,
Yet, I remember your beautiful face,
White as virgin snow,
With a calm and tender soul,
But that was long ago.
If today your cried out to me, “I love you!”
With a vile appearance and odor of men hanging from your teeth,
Spoken softly from me, “forever my love reigns."
All worldly pleasures would I abstain,
For none other than my beloved Lane.
On this day, events transpired which lead to her demise,
My affection is silenced by somber pain,
Forever I will find that comforting warmth in your eyes,
Oh, my sweet, my precious, my alluring Lane.
Your soul, corrupted by hatred,
Torn apart by demonic encumber,
Darken filth covers the white canvas you painted, ,
In your eternal slumber.
Left to suffer alone in silence,
The Gods are cruel and inhumane,
My love still reigns,
For my angelic Lane.
My affection was with you when you were just a women,
It last throughout the ages,
Through your accession to heaven and demise to Hell,
I kissed your lips in our final farewell.
From this moment forth,
Do I adore,
My lovely Lane
And nothing more."