HELP!!! MEDAL AWARDED TO ANYONE THAT HELPS! Use temporal transitions to revise the following paragraph. You may need to create additional details or information. Use proper spelling and grammar. Darius went to the store. He wanted food. He ran into his teacher there. They talked about his latest project. He decided to base his project on gourmet cooking.

At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia animi, id est laborum et dolorum fuga. Et harum quidem rerum facilis est et expedita distinctio. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat facere possimus, omnis voluptas assumenda est, omnis dolor repellendus. Itaque earum rerum hic tenetur a sapiente delectus, ut aut reiciendis voluptatibus maiores alias consequatur aut perferendis doloribus asperiores repellat.

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HELP!!! MEDAL AWARDED TO ANYONE THAT HELPS! Use temporal transitions to revise the following paragraph. You may need to create additional details or information. Use proper spelling and grammar. Darius went to the store. He wanted food. He ran into his teacher there. They talked about his latest project. He decided to base his project on gourmet cooking.

English
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At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia animi, id est laborum et dolorum fuga. Et harum quidem rerum facilis est et expedita distinctio. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat facere possimus, omnis voluptas assumenda est, omnis dolor repellendus. Itaque earum rerum hic tenetur a sapiente delectus, ut aut reiciendis voluptatibus maiores alias consequatur aut perferendis doloribus asperiores repellat.

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@usukidoll can you please help me ill follow you as well
Normally I don't help with questions in English...probably because I need to focus on Mathematics. Hmmmmmmm.... we have to use all past tense though, so your setting better be in the past.
so what would be a good setting? like a time?

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okay thanks & um...like an era or like time as in 2:00..?
well... we still need to respect history as back then people bartered and there weren't any stores. And since the story has to be in past tense, we can't use this week or next week.
barter <- to trade goods with one another
Okay gotcha
the last sentence mentioned "gourmet cooking" so we can't have him go to the dollar store.
Lol so it could be Darius had gone to tho the store lats week.
yes exactly like last week or yesterday
being specific about the time and day works too... as long as it's not the future xD
Okay thanks thats a big help
what about method of transportation? And how old is Darius anyway? Darius could be an adult... maybe he drives or catch the bus? His class could be for community college Or.. Darius could be a teenager in high school and either he caught the bus or his parents drove him.
There is a food science and nutrition class in high school... maybe that's a good subject for where the assignment came from
i see okay yeah
Or he could be in a culinary program at a community college... see how listing all the possibilities we can have different scenarios
yeah thanks i have to write another one as well so ill try that
Temporal transition as in using different grammar devices without changing the original meaning of the paragraph?
Gotcha thanks @Robert136
someone out there got the temporal transition meaning http://openstudy.com/study#/updates/526f23b4e4b017700a8d231e
yeah
ok.. maybe the research topic is a big part of his grade and he's not doing so well right now?! or it could be for extra credit endless possibilities.
mhmmm good idea
Darias had transported his presence to the store.
He had the desire to consume food
He had unexpectedly encountered his teacher there.
I'm using techniques from one of my literary analysis classes from a long time ago. This short 6 word only For Sale Baby Shoes Never Worn
They had a conversation/discourse about their most recent project.
is an example ... of having endless possibilities.
true
He decided upon completing his project via activity called gourmet cooking.
transported? how though? ah lets say by bus xD! keep in mind with the past tense... technology didn't have teleporters xD!
There you have it all
so Darius eats a lot and just from some out of the blue moment bumps into his teacher?! O_O! XDDDDDDD!
Since the means of transportation is not explicitly known, you need to transition the sentence without expressing the means by which he had arrived at the store.
Yess i do! i appreciate it thanks guys @UsukiDoll @Robert136
got it
Therefore, disregard the means, and hence say "arrived to the store" "arrived at the store" "he had moved from point A to point B" kind of way
what about this? "You may need to create additional details or information. Use proper spelling and grammar. "
yeah i see what you mean thanks.
we can create additional details or information. Nothing is stopping us
You can't diverge from what is already stated in the original paragraph, nor make up anything not already said or known.
diverge as in go off from what's already said
as in detracting from what is conveyed by the paragraph
hence nullifying the paragraph in question
very interesting
General English doesn't really intersect with Science English
For example, "get the momentum" doesn't mean so when using the phrase
English speakers are ignorant enough to use the phrase without knowing the physics behind it:):)
but anyway if you can't diverge away from the information, what's the point in this then? "You may need to create additional details or information. Use proper spelling and grammar. " It was listed after the instructions.
I think that temporal transition is valid only when one uses transition verbs/words to make the paragraph flow better. That doesn't allow you to make up things that would blemish the original points being conveyed.
We know that he went to the store, he met his teacher, and that he wanted food, as well as that he had decided to base his project on gourmet cooking
Oh I see like Darius went to the store because he wanted food.
but saying the facts without "connection" doesn't sound rhetorical either.
Since he wanted food, he had gone to the store. Surprisingly he met his teacher out of the blue. After talking to the teacher about his upcoming assignment he had decided to base it on gourmet cooking.
See that flows better
That still conserves the original points
Since Darius wanted food, he had gone to the store. Surprisingly, he met his teacher out of the blue. After talking to the teach about his upcoming assignment, he had decided to base it on gourmet cooking Missing a few commas.
I see so we have to focus on what we already have and use connections to make the sentences flow better.
Good point:)
At least my editing never died xD. Yeah I used to be a big fan of English courses. Not sure what happened...maybe after I declared Math as my major everything in English fell apart...funny though because I still score A's in upper division English. xD.
Yeah everyone is refined every year
I am going into university from this September majoring in Physics. In order to do so, I would still require extensive training in numeracy skills as well as algebraic, even so far as calculus.
oops Since Darius wanted food, he had gone to the store. Surprisingly, he met his teacher out of the blue. After talking to the teach[er] about his upcoming assignment, he had decided to base it on gourmet cooking
Missing any commas? I really suck at commas:)
hehe I already took Calculus 1-4 . The last one is nasty .. and for Calculus II YOU WILL BE MEMORIZING A LOT OF FORMULAS! >:D
I made a typo I typed teach instead of teach[er]
:)
Already inferred
Mathematical Physics is killer. You will be computing a lot and it's lengthy.
I can see that already happening..... thanks to our brains
they say thousands of numbers are unconsciously involved in executing any move
I mean in our biological brain
my homework was long... sure I had 2 weeks but wow still I could barely get to every problem. On top of that I was using LaTeX which types out Math formulas.
I guess we are all paying the price of using calculators
In china calculators are banned
P.S. I haven't been using Calculators for years and I got used to it already
incredbile
where are you based?
Hey let's go to the questio by juliadiogenes

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