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Destinyyyy

  • one year ago

Can I please get help with this essay?

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  1. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    What you've got is good, how long does it have to be?

  2. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    5 paragraphs 700 words @HNeli

  3. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That's really good!

  4. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Ok then. I trust your tutor to know what their talking about, but in my opinion saying "feeling close to nature is fun" isn't something very realistic. People don't really say that. I guess I am understanding now, maybe instead of "Even though..., a resort can also..." you could replace "Even though" with However or Although. Sou it sounds maybe more in a matter a fact tone of that "Although camping can be beautiful, a resort can allow for astonishing sites with perks of...." Sorry if I caused you to be thrown off before, didn't intend on that. Also, I think it makes perfect sense...and I'm the reader.

  5. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay.. Sorry im working on this, talking to you, and doing an excel assignment..

  6. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    It's totally fine I'm not in a rush for anything.

  7. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Alright.. So what should I change this to-- "Camping in the woods or wilderness surrounded by trees and feeling close to nature." What you said is true

  8. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    So with that sentence you could do two things, add to it or change it completely. If you want to add to it you could say " Camping in the woods or wilderness surrounded by trees and feeling close to nature can give you a look to our ancestor's lives." The problem with doing this is that you risk the chance of people miss understanding you like camping more. Now changing it, "Camping in the woods or wilderness surrounded by nature can give you a new kind of experience." Saying this can of course be changed. I think it's unlikely your tutor will ask for more on this sentence, but it all depends on how you'll change the next sentence with the However or Although.

  9. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Alright

  10. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    So like this- Camping or staying at a resort? Both are exciting and unique in their own way, and a resort located in Alaska could be entirely made of ice. Camping in the woods or wilderness surrounded by nature can give you a new kind of experience. Although camping can be an adventure and beautiful, a resort can allow for astonishing sites with perks of air conditioning/heat, cover from weather conditions, and no bugs that bite in the middle of the night.

  11. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That looks just about right. I think it has what your tutor is looking for. How do you like it though? It's your paper.

  12. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I like it.. To be honest I just want to finish it so that I can start my cause and effect essay that are both due on the 5th. So that I can do my final exam with another essay -.-

  13. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Wow. That's a lot of papers...

  14. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yes and thats only for this class. I have 3 others

  15. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That's...yeah sorry to hear about that...

  16. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yeah :/ .. Okay on to the first body

  17. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    This is what I have already- Camping in the woods is nice especially if the campers have something to sleep in, like a tent or camper. Something comfy and will keep the bugs out. If the camper has a tent a blow up mattress is great to have or an extremely fluffy sleeping bag. Maybe the campers aren’t ruffing it as much and have a camper or recreational vehicle to stay in. Rvs and campers have some similarities with resorts. Both have air conditioning/heat and are enclosed with a door to keep bugs outside, especially at night. An area to sit to play games or eat, and some resorts like suites have a kitchenette or full sized kitchen with everything; stove, sink, dishes, microwave. Although resorts have a lot of modern day perks, being outside allows people to go out of our technological society and breathe real fresh air. I was told this- Above, the beginning of this paragraph gives a supporting detail to its main idea. Topic sentences in general give readers a preview of the main idea of body paragraphs to prepare them for the ideas to come. Consider these questions when developing your topic sentence: • What is the main idea/discussion point of this paragraph? - Which aspect of comparison is it about? For example, is it about the level of comfort in camping and in staying in a resort? • What should be your topic sentence to reflect that main idea or discussion point?

  18. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Ok I like what you have. The comparison is there. For me the main idea of this paragraph based on the beginning part of it, was that camping can be more enjoyable when in something like a RV. I like that because it supports your main idea of resorts being better. As you end the paragraph I started getting a little thrown off. "some resorts like suites have a kitchenette or full sized kitchen with everything; stove, sink, dishes, microwave." could probably be cut out of this paragraph and placed in the next one. and instead you could place a fact about campers that they don't have wifi. This way the last sentence looks like it's placed appropriately and you can bring up that in the final or next paragraph as a negative to camping.

  19. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    It is good, but I feel you can elaborate less on what you personally feel about the topic and a little more on what other's point of view is and make sure you have credible sources to support your main points. If this is an essay that requires you not to have pre-revised research then you good as far as research goes in accordance to your personal view and your view in the subject.

  20. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    I agree with grim, but don't forget about a counter argument! What's bad about camping, or being in the outdoors? You know? What is something you can think of that could be a downside? Look at what you wrote and see what you think of to make that "irritable" thing better. What is it about the downside you can make better? I hope that helps :)

  21. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    So like this- Camping in the woods is nice especially if the campers have something to sleep in, like a tent or camper. Something comfy and will keep the bugs out. If the camper has a tent a blow up mattress is great to have or an extremely fluffy sleeping bag. Maybe the campers aren’t ruffing it as much and have a camper or recreational vehicle to stay in. Rvs and campers have some similarities with resorts. Both have air conditioning/heat and are enclosed with a door to keep bugs outside, especially at night. Unlike resorts campers do not have wifi to connect to the internet. Although resorts have a lot of modern day perks, being outside allows people to go out of our technological society and breathe real fresh air.

  22. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yes it does help.. Bad thing weather conditions ruining the campsite and bugs biting

  23. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Yes and now you have a step up in your next paragraph when you compare resorts to camping with wifi, bugs, and weather. Oh and just to give you something else it's terribly hard to park rv's and hook them up.

  24. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Lol yes I know.. Its fun to watch

  25. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I have this already -- At a resort people vacationing do not need to be concerned with the weather possibly destroying their campsite. Or being trapped and scared in a camper or rv. Which can be terrifying if a hurricane or snow storm occurs. In a resort the people staying can relax and enjoy themselves, by going to the indoor pool or hot tub, or the spa and getting a massage. Or for the kids the arcade or play areas. A campsite or open area the campers found, can be fun and enjoyable too if the weather is good, and no bugs are flying around bothering them. If it’s too hot people can become miserable especially if they are being eaten alive by mosquitos. However nice, walls of a resort can never allow someone the star light and freedom of camping.

  26. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Do you know how to use excel?? The two that usually help me aren't online

  27. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Yeah I guess it is lol! Ok so beginning was great. It's kinda the same problem in the last paragraph where the ending is throwing me off a bit. You could maybe move that last sentence to the beginning/mid section. Then maybe add two sentence to it, small ones. I broke it up so it would be easier to see: "At a resort people vacationing do not need to be concerned with the weather possibly destroying their campsite. Or being trapped and scared in a camper or rv. Which can be terrifying if a hurricane or snow storm occurs. However nice, walls of a resort can never allow someone the star light and freedom of camping. Although walls can come in handy. In a resort the people staying can relax and enjoy themselves, by going to the indoor pool or hot tub, or the spa and getting a massage. Or for the kids the arcade or play areas. A campsite or open area the campers found, can be fun and enjoyable too if the weather is good, and no bugs are flying around bothering them. If it becomes too hot though people can become miserable especially if they are being eaten alive by mosquito's." Can you refresh my memory on excel? I may know it.

  28. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I like that! Its this

  29. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    The instructions want me to do some function thing and its not working

  30. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    I wish I could help you with that but I'm lost in it. Sorry Happy that helped a little!

  31. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Its okay.. I think I figured it out (maybe)

  32. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    You should try looking it up on youtube I'm sure there is something that could help.

  33. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Google came up with directions... Should I add more to that body or move on for now?

  34. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    I think you could move on

  35. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay.. I dont have another body. I changed my last main point. It was price and its now bugs.

  36. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Well you can totally work with this! in fact it's better with bugs because resorts are better about that where with price, camping is the better option.

  37. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Um. Resorts better because no bugs but camping better because of price?

  38. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    yeah usually people have to pay well into the hundreds for a resort room. Camping is normally (depending on where you go) anywhere from 30-60 maybe 90 if your some where really nice. Resorts when your out on patio's usually have the bug repellent lights, candles. campers have to bring there own stuff or they will be eaten alive.

  39. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yeah.. But price is no longer part of my thesis or main points "Although camping can be an adventure and beautiful, a resort can allow for astonishing sites with perks of air conditioning/heat, cover from weather conditions, and no bugs that bite in the middle of the night."

  40. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Gotcha ok

  41. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    I have to take care of some stuff really quick I should be back on in like 30 to an hour

  42. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Alright.. Ill work on excel

  43. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Good luck with that lol

  44. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Are you back on?

  45. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    oh yeah sorry

  46. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Its okay.. Im still working on excel

  47. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    how's that going?

  48. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Its going.. I fiured out what I have to do for this IF function thing. But I have to enter it one at a time 42 times on two sheets on two documents -.- I wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy

  49. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    figured *

  50. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Geeze you'd think with all the technology we have things like would be made a lot simpler.

  51. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yeah.. I dont get why its wont let me select all the columns to do the function all at once.. 42 more to go then im done with step 8 out of 19 -.-

  52. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    holy smokes. I'm impressed you are still able to stay awake right now at that point doing that, i'd be sleeping lol

  53. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I wish I could go take a nap

  54. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    lol you should try listening to music, it helps me focus when i'm doing something super boring. time will fly by a lot faster

  55. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Ill try that.. Officially done with step 8

  56. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Yay now only ten more to go, it sounds bad but it's eight less you had to do before

  57. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yeah.. Actually 20. Since I have 2 assignments with 10 more steps

  58. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Nothing, i can't say anything to that, I could say I'm sorry but that's not really gonna help you

  59. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Lol nope

  60. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    what do you have to do that for? like what class?

  61. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    The excel is for my computer application mode class

  62. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    What grade are you?

  63. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Freshman in college.. I use this site cause people on here are creative and I took a year off so im a bit rusting on somethings.. Like I haven't done a compare and contrast essay since middle school. And Ive never used excel till today

  64. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That's cool. I was looking up like a hundred question all the time and openstudy was always popping up somewhere. So after a while of ignoring it I looked into it found it pretty interesting. I haven't been on long, but so far so good the people on here are really nice

  65. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yeah they are.. But be careful of the weird ones. Like yesterday some boy messaged me saying I had nice boobs and that he "fluttered" me the day before.. I responded nicely and told him not to speak to me like that and that I didn't know him then I reported and blocked him.

  66. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I joined this site in middle school. I didn't use it much till now

  67. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Geeze that's creepy. Not like you didn't already gather that. I always hear about things like that but I've never actually talk to someone it happened too. I'm so sorry. It makes me curious as to why people think they can talk to others like that.

  68. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    It's cool you've been on that long. I was wondering how you were able to get all those SmartScores.

  69. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I guess they think that you cant do anything. If they said that in person you'd slap them or go off.... Oh I have no clue what they are or how I got them.. Im assuming its from getting metals

  70. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Yeah that makes sense. That's a good point they probably are from the medals.

  71. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Welp

  72. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    I hate that when you feel like you should say something but there isn't anything left to say it drives me crazy because a lot of people ask if your ignoring them it's just like no..but what am i supposed to say right now.. So if you just stop messaging it's fine lol

  73. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Lol okay.. I usually say "welp" when that happens

  74. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    This is what I have so far

  75. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    It looks great I really like it! Do you think you'll be putting another paragraph on it?

  76. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Yes I need two more paragraphs. The last body about bugs and the conclusion

  77. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    What I thought. A great thing that can pertain to bugs and also give you more in favor of resorts for readers is location. Just as an idea because you have to be careful about repetition, without anything else related to or around the central idea of the paragraph it becomes very easy to just repeat the same things over.

  78. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Um okay... For example Orlando, Florida has mosquitoes and love bugs. And at a resort there are no wingspanroaches or flying palmetto bugs.

  79. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Exactly!

  80. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay... Now to put that into a paragraph...

  81. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    For example Orlando, Florida has mosquitoes and love bugs. And at a resort there are no wingspanroaches or flying palmetto bugs. ***

  82. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Omg why is it doing that.. I typing no "wingspanroaches" and its changing it to wingspanroaches

  83. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    -.- omg

  84. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    LOL that's got to be frustrating I'm so sorry!

  85. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    |dw:1435780338163:dw|

  86. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    YES IT TOOK IT!

  87. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    I dont get why it changed it after I clicked post

  88. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    LOL you can start it with "fortunately resorts have repellent's for their guest's" Then you could use the example you gave. (with wingspanroaches of course) It's a long shot but it might be my computer it's acting really stupid I think I have to restart it I will be back in a few minutes.

  89. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Wow that was annoying lol.. Alright

  90. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Like this- Fortunately resorts have repellent's for their guest's that keep away bugs such as, wingspanroaches and flying palmetto bugs.

  91. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That's great. Do you think you'll be able to work with that to build the rest of the paragraph?

  92. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Um I think so

  93. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Cool

  94. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Fortunately resorts have repellent's for their guest's that keep away bugs such as, wingspanroaches and flying palmetto bugs. They regularly spray insect repellant to keep away pesky bugs, because of this guests rarely see any bugs other than the occasional love bug if the resort is located in Florida or ants that are difficult to control. At a campsite the campers must bring their own bug spray and/or deal with the bugs during their stay. They do not have the luxury of an employee walking around the grounds taking care of the bugs. Campers are forced to deal with flies and ants crawling around or landing on their food and shoes. Once the sun goes down the vampire bugs, mosquitoes have nothing to stop them from biting every second they can. The campers might have insect repellant, but mosquitoes will still fly around. Mosquitoes do not bother guests at resorts, even swimming around the pool at night or walking around enjoying the night sky.

  95. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That looks really good!

  96. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay.. Should I add or remove anything?

  97. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    From what I see it looks really good. Of course you should look at it all together make sure you think it all fit's together nicely. It's looking really good to me though.

  98. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay. Your the reader so I trust you

  99. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    In conclusion camping in the woods or wilderness is nice, because people can go out and enjoy the great outdoors and be close to nature.

  100. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Nice conclusion start but make sure you clearly state resorts being dominate and untimely a better option.

  101. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    In conclusion camping in the woods or wilderness is nice, because people can go out and enjoy the great outdoors and be close to nature. However being a guest at a resort can also make them feel close to nature in a different way, like a resort make of logs on a mountain...

  102. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    ... lost my train of thought

  103. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    lol that happens when you do nothing but work all the time. That's good. You could say "at resorts people can often find trails or lakes. This allows people to get out into nature and have a nice place to comeback to that's clean and cool"

  104. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Oooo thats good

  105. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    Glad to help!

  106. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    In conclusion camping in the woods or wilderness is nice, because people can go out and enjoy the great outdoors and be close to nature. However being a guest at a resort can also make them feel close to nature in a different way, like a resort made entirely of logs located on a mountain or people can often find trails or lakes. This allows people to get out into nature and have a nice place to comeback to that's clean and cool.

  107. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    That looks good. You should try reading it with Although instead of However and see how that sounds. The only real correction I will point out is "like" you should really leave that out. You could put in it's place "an example is. If you do that try seeing how it looks as a separate sentence. I can't picture how long it would be so I recommend looking to see just to make sure it's not a run on then.

  108. grimsnightmare
    • one year ago
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    I have to take care of some stuff and will be back on later. I would love to see what you have. Send me a link and I will look at it when I'm back!!

  109. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Okay.

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