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Destinyyyy

  • one year ago

Assistance with two separate peer reviews on two thesis statement based on the four questions below.

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  1. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Use the following questions as a guideline and comment on two other classmate's thesis statements. Remember, the task here is to offer constructive criticism. -Does the writer provide a valid assertion and points for Comparison or Contrast? -Will the areas he/she previews adequately support and/or develop that topic? Are they set up using parallel structure? -What revisions would you suggest?

  2. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    is this multiple choice

  3. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    What do you think the answer is?

  4. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    ? Its not multiple choice.. And i dont have an answer.. Im asking for other people to give their opinions -based on the questions above- on the thesis statements I posted

  5. anonymous
    • one year ago
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    I think your thesis statements are really good! They compare and contrast nicely, and they can easily support the topic! I think there's a typo in your first one that you might want to fix though ;)

  6. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Neither of the thesis statements are mine.. I need two separate peer reviews on them based off of the questions above.

  7. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    hello :)

  8. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    i dont really know what the "parallel" structure is, but @foodles answered the 2 of the 3 questions.

  9. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    you questions do not ask for a "why"

  10. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    "I think your thesis statements are really good! They compare and contrast nicely, and they can easily support the topic!" this answers q1

  11. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    " I think there's a typo in your first one that you might want to fix though" this answers q3

  12. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    i dont know anything about the "parallel" structure

  13. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    as for the typo i found two, or at least two things that can be improved.

  14. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    short of traditional here i would put "fall short compared to traditional"

  15. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    second, put a period in front of "in the fact"

  16. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    also you never want a thesis to be to long.

  17. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    hope i helped :)

  18. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    but give the medal to @foodles as he was the one that answered first ^.^

  19. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Im not asking for "why" I just need two separate peer reviews. I cant really use the same response "I think your thesis statement is really good! They compare and contrast nicely, and they can easily support the topic!" on two different thesis statements.

  20. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    rephrase it

  21. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    for example...

  22. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    Wow i love the words you used. They really....

  23. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Can you please stop putting everything in separate responses.. Its annoying to scroll up and down to read all of them.

  24. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Ill work with what you gave me. Thank you.

  25. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    oops, sorry for the inconvenience. Anyways good luck :)!

  26. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Would you mind helping with another one?

  27. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    sure, also would you mind also looking at my question :)

  28. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Sorry but I haven't read Macbeth since my junior year in high school. Which was about 3 years ago.

  29. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    i havent read it all, the point is to decipher the excerpt o3o

  30. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    it at all*

  31. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    Anywas, you are being asked to choose one and provide it with other ideas. Or choose two and provide it with ideas?

  32. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Choose two

  33. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    ok lets begin with option three. This one is quite simple. Just provide other ideas. so... The kindle runs on electricity, meaning it must be charged. This also raises your electric bill, and if by chance it dies, u can not read. a pro is that it can contain multiple thousand page books with out needing to strain your back.

  34. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    next lets go with option 2. For this one lets offer a completly new idea. Instead of it being love rollercoasters vs. love rollercosters, lets offer the idea of fear of love vs. fear of a roller coaster, or love a roller coaster vs. loving someone. similarities -people may be afraid of it not ending well -they love it but end up having to part ways -it may be fun at first till you find out it isnt as safe as you had hoped it would be. contrast -roller coasters are more thrilling - you have no controll about what a roller coaster does -etc.

  35. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    I used an informal tone, if you are turning this in specially to a professor make sure to revise the punctuation.

  36. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    as well as the grammar, more "powerful" and "impact full" words can be used than the ones i have provided.

  37. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    Im posting these under their thesis statements. So other students and my professor will see it.. I dont think I can change her ideas like that with the love roller coaster.

  38. Destinyyyy
    • one year ago
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    The first one for number 3 is good.

  39. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    No... don't change the thesis. Change what i said. I used basic words. Wowing the professor with college grammar can earn his favoritism. This is beneficial in future cases, for example if you are late or don't turn something in on time.

  40. jennyrlz
    • one year ago
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    Anyways i must go, i have to do research to find out the answer to my question.

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