anonymous
  • anonymous
poem please let me know what you think
Writing
  • Stacey Warren - Expert brainly.com
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SOLVED
At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia animi, id est laborum et dolorum fuga. Et harum quidem rerum facilis est et expedita distinctio. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat facere possimus, omnis voluptas assumenda est, omnis dolor repellendus. Itaque earum rerum hic tenetur a sapiente delectus, ut aut reiciendis voluptatibus maiores alias consequatur aut perferendis doloribus asperiores repellat.
schrodinger
  • schrodinger
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anonymous
  • anonymous
I find my life eh… I find me as mh… I wish I was… Today was tomorrow! Tomorrow is yesterday! I hope… I need… I’m screwed? I find the light in tomorrow. But I find the strength in today. My life is a shadow Of the world. My might is the beauty of me. But sometimes I lose it. Sometimes it just turns black. And I lose sight of myself… Eventually Velma finds her glasses. So eventually I’ll find the light. Eventually I will find me. Eventually will be today. Because “I’m trying” is never tomorrow. It’s now or it’s in the distance. Strength is a shimmer And a shimmer helps you find the light. Break the patterns not yourself.
anonymous
  • anonymous
@sugarplum15 @YanaSidlinskiy
anonymous
  • anonymous
i like where youre going with this but i think you need more transitions like at the end for an example you were talking about distance and then you went straight into shimmer. what if you said something along the lines of in the distance you lose the shimmer and then say whatever you said about shimmer. it makes it less choppy and easier to follow

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anonymous
  • anonymous
hope that helps! also though keep in mind that its your own style and if you like choppy thats completely fine... just a thought i had
madhu.mukherjee.946
  • madhu.mukherjee.946
its really nice but plss try to add some rhyming scheme to your poem then it will become gorgeous:))) thats my completely personal opinion...pls don't mind anything

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