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I feel a wet dampness in the middle of my palm. Opening my eyes, all I see is darkness corrupting me. Then my vision becomes clearer adjusting to the darkness. I feel my palm to discover the wet substance only to find out it is sweat. As I try to get up my legs give out and I'm paralyzed. My gut is telling me to run. Only if I could, I say to myself. Then a silvery voice follows.... “You’re going straight to my head, and I’m headed straight to the edge… I pick my poison and it’s you!” I recognize this immediately and shut eyes tight when I open them I’m in my bed room I think to myself that must be a dream. *the music continues to play from my ringtone on my phone* *Aero answers the phone*...”Hey who is this?” "Wow can you look at ur contacts name before you ask? ....IT’S YOUR BEST FRIEND DUHHH!"
"Omg I'm sorry hey Charlie ....You know u woke me up?" There was a long pause before Aero heard sobbing on the other end. Aero: “Charlie what happened!?!?!? Are you ok? Answer me Charlie…!” “Ye….Yea…Yes Aero…” sobbed Charlie. “Tell me what’s going on…” “I will but I can’t say over the phone ill meet you at your house, be there soon!”
As I wait for Charlie to come over I start to tidy up the house my parents are on a business trip so I have the whole house to myself. Showing that I can clean after myself is a great way to show responsibilities and prove to them that I can be an independent young lady. Not even after five minutes of me wiping the kitchen cabinets, I hear a knock. I jump up in surprised because I was so focused on killing I totally forgot Charlie was coming over.
so focused on killing, do you mean cleaning?
xDDDDDD yeaaa lol..in Mircosoft I corrected it..but in reality I was focus on killing u
btw not bad
but to me: feel a wet dampness in the middle of my palm... I feel my palm to discover the wet substance only to find out it is sweat. kinda set it off?
like why so much detail on one little thing?
also i did not understand what/why killing the reader has to do anything with the plot?
another thing, could you continue? I really liked it
..Um the word killing was a typo meant to be cleaning and I like to add detail to my stories I make so the reader can imagine being in the state the character is in or at least relate to it..
Its seems like a cool setup as a whole..Good job!
As I slow dragged myself to the door I checked the peephole of the door to make sure it was Charlie. When I opened the door she jumped on me caressing me in a warm hug with tears rolling down her face. She explains to me what happened- Her parents kicked her out because she didn’t complete her college credits so she didn’t have enough credits to finish her degree. We both sit down and I give her a shoulder to cry on and sympathy because I could remember how my parents were academically strict on me back then. After hugging her I explained to her that I’m going to order pizza she nodded yes. After calling up the Italian pizza place and ordering pizza I went to check on her and she was sleeping peacefully on the couch.
cool more? or is that it?