Coudld someone makw suggestions to this short story please?

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Coudld someone makw suggestions to this short story please?

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At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia animi, id est laborum et dolorum fuga. Et harum quidem rerum facilis est et expedita distinctio. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat facere possimus, omnis voluptas assumenda est, omnis dolor repellendus. Itaque earum rerum hic tenetur a sapiente delectus, ut aut reiciendis voluptatibus maiores alias consequatur aut perferendis doloribus asperiores repellat.

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What exactly do you need help with?
hi @vera_ewing like suggestions on it i finsihed it but i need to make sure tht its good and amkes sense

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Where is this short story?
ill get it
@vera_ewing !!! OMG
I can't download it.
ok
I open the key in the lock and opened the door. To my surprise, I envisioned a clean house. This is not how I left everything before! Where are my lucky diamond earrings? Where did all my clothes go? I switched on the light bulb. A shadow raced behind me. Running to the kitchen to grab a knife, I shouted, "Is anyone here:" No reply. I see two tall, sinister shadows in the living room. I couldn't catch a glimpse of what was going on, but it looked like they were whispering. Then. My house phone started ringing. It rang several times and then the ringing stopped. I heard a deep voice say, "Hello". The voice sounded like a man mid-30s. Then I heard another, "Hello". This voice sounded like a woman also mid-30s. I was scared to death, because two people were in my house whom I did not know! My worst nightmare was coming true. Looking back at the living room, one of the shadow’s pointed too the kitchen and started walking towards where I was. Without a moments glance, I raced upstairs. I ran to my room and locked the door. Thinking to myself, “Okay, stay calm. Do not freak out”. Suddenly, a BANG came from the door. I dragged the armoire from my room to hold the door shut. Then another THUD came from the door. The armoire fell over and ran into my back. I fell down. Crying with agony I couldn't come up. The armoire was too heavy. "Okay," I whispered myself "Push the table on 1. 2. 3." I leveraged my bodyweight to push the armoire against the door. An intense, sharp pain was now issuing from my arm. I knew that I had cracked my arm. The shadows started to hit the door with a hammer. Startled, I ran away from the door. Sitting on the floor I tucked my knees to my chest and closed my eyes. When I opened them the two shadows were standing in front of me. A gun was pointing right towards my head. With a tear rolling down my eyes, my last word was, "Goodbye". I open the key in the lock and opened the door. To my surprise, I see my body lying across the floor.
thats the only other way i could do it @vera_ewing @vera_ewing @vera_ewing
lol
:( @TaylorBrooks137 serously
It's nice. Although perhaps you should cut back on the "to my surprise"'s.
oh thats the prompt and thank you!
I would look up suggestions for short story on google
ok thank you all :D @TaylorBrooks137 @KyantheNoddle and I guess @vera_ewing

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