A community for students.

Here's the question you clicked on:

55 members online
  • 0 replying
  • 0 viewing

narissa

  • one year ago

Is anyone good at a writing a memoir

  • This Question is Closed
  1. anonymous
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    about what

  2. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    I already wrote it its about a time when my arm got broke, teacher revised it and sent feed back

  3. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    I need to fix it because i got a d and I have to fix it and send it back tomorrow

  4. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

  5. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    @isaiah97

  6. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    Do u know how to do this?

  7. tacotime
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 1

    Your teacher gave you lots of good feedback

  8. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    yes can u help me fix it?

  9. tacotime
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 1

    “Come here give me your hand,” he said, to my little brother. We got home, and ate Doritos and salsa. My mom carried me into her room, put cartoons on and then I fell asleep. In the end you can talk more about how your siblings feel about how cautious are and how you care for them.

  10. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    to begin with I should put --On a cold, breezy, fall day,on the fourth of November in 2004,we were moving into our new,big huge house in Hemet,Ca.

  11. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    Is that a complete sentence?

  12. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    is commas and punctuation correct?

  13. tacotime
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 1

    On a cold, breezy, fall day,on the fourth of November in 2004,we were moving into our new house in Hemet,CA. He grabbed my hand and flung me over his shoulder. I heard a snap! Immediately felt pain in my elbow. in this part talk more about the emotions you felt. Be more specific than "pain".

  14. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    its only hard because i was only five

  15. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    @triciaal

  16. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    This will take a while but go step by step. For each comment the teacher has made address the situation.

  17. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    ok

  18. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    im already trying but

  19. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    In the fall of 2004 the day we moved to Hemet, California. this is not a complete sentence

  20. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    you said "the day we moved to Hemet "

  21. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    @tacotime has a good response watch for my edit On a cold, breezy, fall day, the fourth of November in 2004, we moved into our new house in Hemet, CA.

  22. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    I wrote so far---- On a cold,breezy,fall day, on November 4,2004,we were moving into our new home in Hemet,Ca. My mom told my older brother, Phillip,to keep my liitle brother, Wesley, and me busy, while my mom and dad were unpacking the kitchen. My mom and dad were so excited, with moving into our new home,they could not wait to unpack. My mom handed,Phillip a big, clear tub of little green army men. My little brother and I rushed into, the huge living room.

  23. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    My mom told my older brother, Phillip, to keep my little brother, Wesley, and me busy while she and my dad unpacked.

  24. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    We were excited too! Instead, of Phillip doing as he was told, he flung my little brother,Wesley over his shoulder, as I was jumping around. My little brother was laughing with excitement, I began jumping up and down saying me next, my turn! Phillip,then grabbed me, as I was on the top of his shoulder,I felt pain in my arm. I screamed,stop! Phillip continued, I felt my arm snap!

  25. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    but the teacher commented on she

  26. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    ok nvm she underlined it because i wrote unpacked

  27. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    so is that good so far?

  28. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    My mom ran into the room, and yelled “WHAT HAPPENED” I you do not type caps and you need a question mark

  29. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    so a the beginning is it we were moving or we moved

  30. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    k im going to continue writing and then,post again and tag you can u check the commas punctuation etc for me when im finished?

  31. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    remember to include direct words said in quotation marks. do not use caps for yelling in a regular document double space the document and remove space before and after paragraphs.

  32. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    k

  33. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    you should also describe more of what is going on relate to how you are feeling example you were not just in pain you felt like.......

  34. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    . On our way home my mom bought me, salsa and Doritos. read this again and you will be laughing

  35. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    mom was hysterical and older brother was crying knew he did wrong but, wouldn't tell mom what happened stuff like thayt?

  36. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    how much did you cost?

  37. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    lol bought

  38. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    not me or for me

  39. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    since it wasn't just for you on the way home we stopped and bought .....

  40. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    k

  41. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    i will be back in 5

  42. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    thanks for ur help

  43. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    I heard a snap and I was immediately relieved, I heard a snap and I felt like all the ligaments had reconnected and everything was back in place. I had a tingling sensation and I was over come with emotion I felt like the ordeal was over. I had s a tremendous sense of relief. I did not have to worry about if I would be able to use my arm. the teacher said put more feeling don't just tell the story and watch your punctuation

  44. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    I had s a trem typo

  45. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    wow ur making it easier

  46. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    for the ending you need to put much more. This has affected you and has a lasting effect. As an older sister put some of how you feel not horse-playing with your younger siblings because you can visualize one of them getting hurt and having to go to the hospital; scared something worse than a broken arm etc.. feel like not a fun older sister having to explain why you don't horse-play etc review and make sure you follow-up with each entry the teacher made. I did most but not all. You get the idea. You know how to do this now. All the best.

  47. narissa
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    thank u sooo much when im finished can i post it and have u check?

  48. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    the idea is "on the day we moved "

  49. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    you are welcome

  50. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    topic the day we arrived moving day first day no more horse-play ?

  51. triciaal
    • one year ago
    Best Response
    You've already chosen the best response.
    Medals 0

    suggestion 1) format for paragraph, spacing etc 2) grammar and punctuation 3) include the feeling 4) add more to the effects 5) ok to add lesson to share

  52. Not the answer you are looking for?
    Search for more explanations.

    • Attachments:

Ask your own question

Sign Up
Find more explanations on OpenStudy
Privacy Policy

Your question is ready. Sign up for free to start getting answers.

spraguer (Moderator)
5 → View Detailed Profile

is replying to Can someone tell me what button the professor is hitting...

23

  • Teamwork 19 Teammate
  • Problem Solving 19 Hero
  • You have blocked this person.
  • ✔ You're a fan Checking fan status...

Thanks for being so helpful in mathematics. If you are getting quality help, make sure you spread the word about OpenStudy.

This is the testimonial you wrote.
You haven't written a testimonial for Owlfred.