MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
can someone plz look at my essay
English
  • Stacey Warren - Expert brainly.com
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SOLVED
At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia animi, id est laborum et dolorum fuga. Et harum quidem rerum facilis est et expedita distinctio. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat facere possimus, omnis voluptas assumenda est, omnis dolor repellendus. Itaque earum rerum hic tenetur a sapiente delectus, ut aut reiciendis voluptatibus maiores alias consequatur aut perferendis doloribus asperiores repellat.
schrodinger
  • schrodinger
I got my questions answered at brainly.com in under 10 minutes. Go to brainly.com now for free help!
jackfrost33
  • jackfrost33
kk
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
here you go

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More answers

jackfrost33
  • jackfrost33
what do you want to know about it cause its really good
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
plz look at my grammar and spelling mistake
jackfrost33
  • jackfrost33
kk
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
and look at my sentence structure is it making scence or not
jackfrost33
  • jackfrost33
it has good structure and a helpful hint for second-guessing yourself w/ spelling simple just look it up
anonymous
  • anonymous
Im correcting sentence structure now. What is 'maladies'?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
oh yeah it be the malaria disease
anonymous
  • anonymous
So is it supposed to be there?
anonymous
  • anonymous
Maybe use abnormalities instead.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
yeah it was has to be there because smoke also effects the malaria disease
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
@Whitelynx ok but what about the whole essay is it look good or
anonymous
  • anonymous
Overall, the essay is pretty dang good. You have good, structured paragraphs, and pretty sound arguments. Occasionally your sentences are confusing though. For instance: "such as people smoking last for five years will damage their respiratory system" is bad grammar. what should we replace it with?
anonymous
  • anonymous
Your essay structure as a whole is pretty clean too.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
@Whitelynx do you want me to delete that sentence
anonymous
  • anonymous
No. I think we should change it.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
how??
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
any idea?
anonymous
  • anonymous
Ill put corrections in red. Ill send it to you soon. I barely changed the sentence.
anonymous
  • anonymous
Just give me a bit.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok fine
anonymous
  • anonymous
"cigar smokers who inhale" I think we should get rid of "who inhale" but I'm not actually going to take anything like that out incase you want to leave it. Im just going to strikethrough it.
anonymous
  • anonymous
Actually, I'll underline stuff I'm not sure about. Anything that you should get rid of will be strikethroughed
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok fine
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
wait are you goona send me the document or what
anonymous
  • anonymous
Yeah. Sorry its taking so long. Im being careful with my check.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
no worry its fine and by the way thnx for helping and giving ur time
anonymous
  • anonymous
No problem bro. You ended one of your paragraphs with "Compared to non-smokers, cigar smokers who inhale deeply." which is an incomplete sentence.
anonymous
  • anonymous
Dued wanna know a good site ??
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
good site for what
anonymous
  • anonymous
http://www.reverso.net/spell-checker/english-spelling-grammar/ take chunks and paste it in and check it works!!
anonymous
  • anonymous
to check grammar and punctuation
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
is it free
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok thnx
anonymous
  • anonymous
yes :) fan and medal for help in future to I'm good at science
anonymous
  • anonymous
o and math but more science guy :)
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
@Whitelynx are you still here
anonymous
  • anonymous
yes I'm back
anonymous
  • anonymous
o need help or naw from me??
anonymous
  • anonymous
You should indent the first line of each new paragraph
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
what you mean by indent
anonymous
  • anonymous
indent=type tab
anonymous
  • anonymous
dued let me see the paper?
anonymous
  • anonymous
Attach Brb
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok bck let see
anonymous
  • anonymous
wen i click it nothing pops up for me but on the top is says "Untitled"
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
1 Attachment
anonymous
  • anonymous
" In some caught smoke also help the elders because" what do you mean?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
is one is better
anonymous
  • anonymous
yes and indent 1st line
anonymous
  • anonymous
Example of indentation: (click tab here)Smoking cigarettes should be made illegal in Canada. According to the Health Canada, Cigarette smoke kills over 37,000 people in Canada each year. That's more than the amount of all murders, alcohol-related deaths, car accidents and suicides. The inquiry has also shown that, in 2002, about 17% of deaths were due to smoking (20% in males and 12% in females).
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
what you mean click tab here
anonymous
  • anonymous
on your key board thats how you indent
anonymous
  • anonymous
do you have a google dox account
anonymous
  • anonymous
I can correct it on that easy
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
yeah i do
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok paste it on a google dox and then make it by sharing it and make the link public,everyone can view then paste like in the box
anonymous
  • anonymous
here 1 sec
anonymous
  • anonymous
https://docs.google.com/a/bsd220.org/document/d/1W7MXNXQgARadFdWoz9nJc40KmvIrG5kD3M22B4A8UVc/edit?usp=sharing
anonymous
  • anonymous
Aye. Finished corrections. here.
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ODP9AT8P3PKCWzmFxJqW8A0mbUHpvzQew1-Flv5zNmU/edit
anonymous
  • anonymous
i don't think u got all of them-_-
anonymous
  • anonymous
Does your teacher require mla format? If so, you need to re-do your bibliography portion so that it includes all the necessary information
anonymous
  • anonymous
MTALH got to this link >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1W7MXNXQgARadFdWoz9nJc40KmvIrG5kD3M22B4A8UVc/edit?usp=sharing
anonymous
  • anonymous
I have to sleep now. I got almost all of your mistakes. Red is my corrections red with a line is stuff you should delete, and red with underlined is stuff I'm not sure of. The others can help with the rest. Night!
anonymous
  • anonymous
White r u sure you got everything
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
@Whitelynx i can't open ur document thou
anonymous
  • anonymous
Almost positive. Go over it again though. his last paragraphs were choppy, so I did a lot there.
anonymous
  • anonymous
Read second sentence-_-
anonymous
  • anonymous
Meh. Go over it. Night.
anonymous
  • anonymous
MTH r u on this link ?
anonymous
  • anonymous
Night Bruh
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
yes i am
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok just look how i correct it ok?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok fine
anonymous
  • anonymous
hey can u chat so i can ask you some questions
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok
anonymous
  • anonymous
smoke?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
wat?
anonymous
  • anonymous
kills? or killed Ps when I ask u a question go back to the doc to see what I'm asking you ok?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
idk i will say killed
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
what you think
anonymous
  • anonymous
killed sounds right
anonymous
  • anonymous
bruh i need to hurry ok it almost midnight need to sleep
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok i know i also have to go
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
lets do it
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
what is yello fever
anonymous
  • anonymous
nvm do u know what tar is
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
oh yeah i know
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
the black thing in the ciagrees
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
right
anonymous
  • anonymous
Yh
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
its be tar not ta
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
i mean in the document you put ta
anonymous
  • anonymous
does this have to have a certain amount of paragraphs and is this due tommaro?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
lol its due tonight
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok and is there a paragraph climate?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
is has to be 750 to 100 words i guess so
anonymous
  • anonymous
stupid auto correct limate
anonymous
  • anonymous
wait 75 to 100 word!
anonymous
  • anonymous
word!?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
750
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
Potential Essay Topics: Essay Length: 750-100 Words
anonymous
  • anonymous
ps this might take a while so hold on tight for me ok your ideas are all over the place
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok no worry i am here
anonymous
  • anonymous
wait so what solution are u talking about?
anonymous
  • anonymous
and it wouldn't save money but would help with keeping your body fit
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok so they only ban the smoking ciagrees in the family place which is good to be safe from smoking but i am saying its not a properly way to safe from the smoking we have to do something else for being safe
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
ok sohal
anonymous
  • anonymous
no I know what your talking about I'm past that
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
oh ok
anonymous
  • anonymous
Tip Don't use first,second,third,etc
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok find better transition words
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
why not but these are the transition words thou
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
know where are we
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok done with first two paragraphs
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
thanks gud
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
thnx a lot
anonymous
  • anonymous
done with 3rd also
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
good
anonymous
  • anonymous
I don't think cigarets are waste of money to the government
anonymous
  • anonymous
dued I really need to leave in like 10 min hopefully I finish we wills ok
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
i know its waste of our own money thou
anonymous
  • anonymous
we will see
anonymous
  • anonymous
o thats what u meant to say ok
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
we have to pay for medication etc
anonymous
  • anonymous
acually there is no medication for tar in the lungs
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
oh really
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
wait do you use that grammar website
anonymous
  • anonymous
I am now I'm freaking tired AF
anonymous
  • anonymous
just for the last 2 paragraphs of so
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
lol its almost done man
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
you can do it
anonymous
  • anonymous
I know i got you ill finish it
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
why the way are you muslim
anonymous
  • anonymous
I mean some of you thesis statements are off but there workable
anonymous
  • anonymous
yes I am XD
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
nice
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
just delete that line
anonymous
  • anonymous
Dude your so lucky that whitlynx never checked it or you would be screwed
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
wait how is it the waste of the consumers money
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
if people smoke alot then the consumers get more money
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
inshallah you will get a reward from allah for helping
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
thnx a lot man and may god bless you
anonymous
  • anonymous
hey dude how many words does it have to be?
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
750 to 100 i guess so
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok 687 or something like that and I'm Done :)
anonymous
  • anonymous
so copy and paste that into a word document
anonymous
  • anonymous
what grade r u in
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
lol thnx a lot
anonymous
  • anonymous
np wat grade r u in?:)
anonymous
  • anonymous
I dont judge
anonymous
  • anonymous
I'm just curious
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
12
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
actually english is not my first language so
anonymous
  • anonymous
O kool hey dude fan me for future help I don't really care if you want to give me a medal you can but it don't matter to me
anonymous
  • anonymous
Mine either Hindi is mine
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
so are you from India
anonymous
  • anonymous
no i was born in the Us,Illinois
anonymous
  • anonymous
hey got ps3?
anonymous
  • anonymous
ok ima go to sleep but fan me so I can help u in the future
MTALHAHASSAN2
  • MTALHAHASSAN2
why lol
anonymous
  • anonymous
because i could play with u i got a mic
anonymous
  • anonymous
hello?
anonymous
  • anonymous
bye then XD
anonymous
  • anonymous
Find the verb in the sentence (GAVE) Ask "What was given?" (The blue ribbon) Ask " Who was given the blue ribbon?" (Rosa) I used this and it helped A LOT! I got 100s on a bunch of tests. :)

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